


New Year New Beginnings

by Deadriot



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: M/M, New Year's Eve, New Year's Kiss, New Years
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-02
Updated: 2018-01-02
Packaged: 2019-02-26 14:28:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13237662
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Deadriot/pseuds/Deadriot
Summary: It is sometimes easy to fall into dark places within the mind.





	New Year New Beginnings

**Author's Note:**

> I am writing this just because having someone to share New Year is something that feels like an alien concept and definitely something exhilarating. It makes people realise that they love that special someone.

He had hated winter holidays his entire life. For him, they were just another date filled with the tedious conundrum relative to the season. It had been early in his childhood that he discovered that the holidays held nothing but an excuse to spend money in useless things. He was certainly above all these things.

Enter one Dr. John H. Watson.

Meeting him felt almost like fate. A tedious one that brought him both happiness as much as confusion as he had no idea how to solve everything that went in his mind. Suicide apart, and the 2 years that he though Sherlock was dead created a gap in their relationship that often felt like he was drowning. He was lost without his blogger.

The tedious thing about New Year, is that you get to sit there in the middle of everything and see how happy everyone is around you. He has always had problems with how he saw himself but now he hated himself more than any other year. Why would anyone ever look his way, or love someone like him? He had always been the un-dateable because of his intellect and his love and passion for knowledge on what people often saw as gruesome trivia.

Alone was what he had. Alone protected him.

So now, he was sitting by the mantlepiece with the fire of the hearth as his only comfort. Things with John might never be the same and everything felt lost after Mary died. She had been an interesting opponent, he admired her intellect and cleverness to go unnoticed. Of all the women he knew, she had been the most intriguing and a worthwhile puzzle to dissect and observe; perhaps even learn from. Devastation punched them both when she died. He was never able to shake off the guilt even though he knew that she had pushed him out of the line of fire.

For that he’d be eternally grateful.

He had some microwave dinner and was waiting for the noisy racket that accompanied the New Year’s festivities as people just love to create clutter and trash, that without including the impact on the air quality. Depression was a looming darkness over his head and an ice-cold feeling pressed against his heart in his ribcage. Logic told him everything was in his mind, but sentiment was not backing down. Misery was an all-consuming monster that creeps into people’s mind and tarnishes every happy memory into a monstrous disaster.

He was not a pessimist, he just accepted facts as they were.

The footsteps on the stairs brought him back from his self-depreciating thoughts and focused on the matter at hand: John came.

‘Sherlock?! Are you in?’ The question sounded odd, it was as if he no longer felt at home in 221B Baker Street. The thought brought him sadness.

‘Yes John!’ he called as an answer as he added to himself ‘where else would I be?’

When he saw John’s face, he sobered up. ‘What’s the matter?’

‘You weren’t picking up.’

‘My phone… is not here’ he said as he turned to the table and found it empty. ‘Pardon me, my mistake. Something the matter?’

‘I just needed to make sure you were alright.’

‘Well, you’ve seen me. Your task is complete, you can leave.’

‘Sherlock.’ He knew Sherlock better than anyone else in the world and had known from the moment he laid eyes on him that something was wrong. ‘I came to see you because I wanted to.’

Silence is sometimes louder than any sound in the world. This moment was deafening.

‘I’d like to be alone John.’ The statement hurt and was filled with pain even to his own ears. He felt ashamed for his weakness.

‘I don’t think so. I’m going to make a deduction and you are to answer me truthfully. I think I deserve to know. You are in love with me.’

‘Yes.’ Came Sherlock’s curt reply. He was getting defensive, John could practically hear all the thoughts racing through his mind as he created and devised plans, schemes and statements made to hurt.

‘Good.’ He kissed Sherlock closing the ever closing gap between them. ‘Happy New Year.’


End file.
